There’s something poetic about port and starboard. They’re not just directions; they’re a vibe. They smell like salt spray and sound like creaking wood, even if you’re on a plastic pontoon boat.
It’s the same reason we use “bow” instead of “front” and “stern” instead of “back.” It makes your average Tuesday feel like an adventure. Suddenly, you’re not just on a lake—you’re underway.
So next time you’re on a boat, don’t be afraid to look lost. Just nod, mutter “starboard” under your breath, and point at the nearest seagull. No one will know you’re still guessing. And if they call you out? Blame the empty port wine bottle.
