First, check if you’re affected. Octopus will email you. Or check your app—if it works.
Second, keep a pen and paper handy. Write down your meter reading weekly. Be a time traveler from 1998.
Third, laugh. Really. This is a first-world problem at its finest. Your meter is having a tiny existential crisis.
Fourth, imagine Octopus Energy’s call center. Workers with tentacle puppets, sipping tea, saying “Sorry, the meter is feeling shy.”
The Punchline
So 600,000 meters might go quiet. But you? You can still talk to your meter. Give it a name. Name it “Steve.”
Check Steve’s screen. Pet his plastic casing. Tell him he’s a good meter.
In a few weeks, Octopus will flip a switch. Steve will reconnect, blabbing data again. And you’ll have a funny story about that time your meter ghosted you.
That’s the joy of tech. It’s never boring. Just like an octopus—it can squirt ink, escape tanks, and occasionally, mess up 600,000 smart meters at once.
Stay curious, stay amused, and maybe buy a candle. Your meter might not work, but your vibe always does.
