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There is also a toggle for Test Alerts. These are the silly pop-ups that carriers send to check their equipment, and they always seem to happen during the climax of a movie. Feel free to turn these off immediately. The government won’t know, and your phone won’t report you to the FCC. It’s like jaywalking, but for your sanity.

Now, if you are a true rebel—or perhaps just someone with anxiety—you might wonder if there’s a way to stop the sound of these alerts without turning them off. Oh, there is. And it’s glorious. Go to Settings > Sound & Haptics, then scroll down to Emergency Alert Tone. You can change it to a short “Bypass” tone, or—here’s the ultimate hack—just turn your phone’s silent switch to on. The alert will vibrate quietly instead of blaring like a panicked goose. It’s the equivalent of putting a muzzle on a screaming baby: controversial, but peaceful.

How to stop your iPhone from blaring out emergency alerts | Cult of Mac

The One Alert You Cannot Escape

I hate to break it to you, but Presidential Alerts are legally required to play through your phone at full volume, even if your phone is in “Do Not Disturb” mode. Yes, that includes if you’re in a funeral, a library, or a silent meditation retreat. The government decided that nuclear war is more important than your zen garden. However, here’s the hilarious truth: Presidential Alerts have only been used once in U.S. history (for a nationwide test in 2018), and it crashed some older iPhones. So realistically, you’ll probably never see one unless aliens invade or the president needs to tell you that “The price of eggs is going up again.”

One final, glorious trick: if you want to never be startled again, you can completely disable all sounds by flipping the “Emergency Alerts” toggle off and enabling “Bypass” in sound settings. Combine this with a thick case that muffles the vibration, and your iPhone will become as quiet as a library mouse. Just remember to check local news manually. You don’t want to be that person who ignores a flash flood warning because you were too smug about your silent phone.

So there you have it. Go forth, toggle those switches, and reclaim your peace. Your iPhone will still be a powerful tool for global communication—it just won’t feel the need to announce every single incident within a 200-mile radius. Sleep soundly, my friend. And if the president ever calls, tell them you’re busy.