Here’s the thing no one tells you: the cost of a testicle is really about what it does. They produce testosterone and sperm. Without them, you might need hormone therapy, which costs about $30 to $200 a month for the rest of your life. That’s like a Netflix subscription, but instead of binge-watching, you’re binge-worrying about your bone density.
And if you lose both? Well, you’ll likely need a pair of prosthetics. Yes, prosthetic testicles exist. They’re called “testicular implants,” and they cost anywhere from $1,000 to $3,000 each. That’s $6,000 for a set of fake marbles. But hey, they won’t get cold in the winter, and they’re always perfectly symmetrical. So there’s that.
