Honestly? You don’t even need to boil tails. You can steam them (add 1 minute) or bake them at 375°F for 10–12 minutes. But boiling gives you that perfectly even cook every time.
Pro move: after boiling, shock them in ice water for 10 seconds to stop the cooking. That little trick locks in the tenderness. Then serve with melted butter and a smug grin.
Remember: no one at your dinner table will ask if the lobster was boiled for exactly 7.5 minutes. They’ll just be thrilled they’re not eating chicken nuggets. You’ve got this.
Final, Absolute, No-Nonsense Boiling Time
Boil water, drop in tails, set timer for 1 minute per ounce, then check. If it’s opaque and smells like heaven, you’re done. If it’s still a little translucent, give it 30 more seconds. If it’s rubbery, blame the timer, not yourself.
Go forth and boil, my friend. And if all else fails, eat it with a side of laughter—and a pool of clarified butter. That’s how you win at lobster.